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The 25 Deadliest Words and Phrases in Insurance
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8. "Please note that..." Again, here's a phrase that may seem innocent but it has, for me, a rather schoolmarmish tone( "Now, pay attention!"). I'd omit the phrase.
9. "Enclosed please find." - This phrase, more than any other in the world of business writing, epitomizes the lawyer-like way people start to write when they are either desperate to avoid using a pronoun like "I" or simply love to repeat phrases they've seen in other letters without ever thinking for themselves. After all, what do you have to "find"?
   
   Reminds me of a joke. A guy goes into a restaurant and orders a steak dinner. Later, the waiter walks over to the table, smiles obsequiously, and asks "How did you find your steak?" The guy looks at the waiter and says, "I just moved the mashed potatoes--and there it was!"
   
   When The Beatles were returning home after coming to the United States, a journalist asked them: "How did you find America?" One the Fab Four answered, "We turned left at Greenland."
10. "Under separate cover" - When you write, "I am sending you this "under separate cover," you are perpetuating a formalistic and old fashioned phrase. When I hear the word "cover," I think of a big spaghetti pot and that reminds me to "boil down" the thought to read, "I am sending it to you separately [or by FedEx, etc.]"
11. Contact the undersigned (Send it to the undersigned) - News flash: you are the undersigned! It is perfectly fine to write, Send it to me." People tend to distrust the perfectly fine words "me" and "you." To prove it, think about what you say when you run into a colleague in town. "How are you?" you say, correctly. And they probably answer: "Fine. And yourself?" Of course, it should be, "Fine. And you?"
12. "ASAP" ("As soon as possible") - ASAP is the blandest, vaguest term in business writing. It does imply quickly, but justs how quickly is a matter of interpretation. If you need a document within two weeks, write: "If possible, please send it to me by [name a date two weeks from the date you a writing]."
13. "Finalize" - Every businessperson's all-purpose hedge word. But what does it really mean? If you say you are going to "finalize" my contract next week, what are you saying you'll do? Agree to it? Sign it? Complete writing it? Be specific: "I'll sign your contract next week."
14. "Dear Sir or Madam" - Not only does it sound as if you can't make up your mind, but it ignores the fact that "Madam" is both archaic and, well, has a sexual connotation that doesn't relate to your message. If you are unable to find out the correctly spelled name and title of the person to whom you are writing, then you must settle for some generic rendering of the title: "Dear Benefits Manager," "Dear Managing Attorney," or "Dear Commissioner."
15. "To Whom It May Concern" - Would you be eager to open a piece of correspondence addressed in this way?
16. "I trust that ... " - Very often, I see this phrase at the end of a lengthy reply to a Insurance Commissioner regarding a complaint against the way your company has handled a claim. The writer responding is a bit miffed at having to once again explain the facts and how his judgment was made. Usually, the letter is just filled with a regurgitation of the claim, but sometimes the writer can't resist using this phrase, a phrase which gives off a tone of "I hope this answers all your damn questions and that you'll leave me in peace!" Leave this smarmy phrase out!
17. Thank you in advance for your cooperation. (Your cooperation is appreciated) - Here's a radical idea: Do not thank people for what they will do for you in the future. That's presumptuous. Just thank them for what they've done in the past. If you are asking something that is no big deal, just say "please." If, on the other hand, you are trying to motivate your reader to do something he or she doesn't want to do, thank you won't help. You'll have to motivate the reader, just as you'd have to motivate a child when trying to get action. "Thank you" may be polite but it hardly is a motivator.

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